Simplify Your Holidays & Focus on the Love

  A Less Is More Christmas List  --  Author Gary Foreman explains how to give gifts that don't cost a lot of money by setting aside the wallet and finding creative ways to spend your time and feelings with those you love.  Examples include babysitting for a couple with kids; creating a photo album or video that will let distant grandparents feel more connected with your family; and letting friends know in advance that instead of exchanging gifts you would like to schedule a dinner together sometime after the holiday rush.


Inexpensive Gifts  -- These innovative ideas (contributed by the readers of The Labor of Love.com) include the better known homemade-soup-mix-in-a-decorated-jar and t-shirts decorated with the grandkids' hand prints, as well as newer twists like homemade "potpourri pie" and hand-warming "pocket buddies". 
 

 

Turn Holiday Chores into Bonding Time

Cooking/Baking together

Turn an unavoidable task into something your loved ones will look back on with fondness.  Plan your holiday cooking ahead of time and ask family members which tasks or items they would enjoy helping out with.  Keep in mind that some people would just rather clean the bathroom and vacuum the living room than help out in the kitchen.  And that's okay too.

Also if you have young children, aged 3 to 8, you will find that even if they can't do very much on their own, they will get real enjoyment out of helping you pour in the ingredients (I used to fill the measuring cup, then let the little ones do the actual pouring into the bowl) or out of doing the last bit of stirring and mixing.  For little ones, being part of the process is being part of the magic making.

Some online recipe sources:

Land O'Lakes cookie recipes   It's true, so many cookies really do taste best with butter.  And as we're discovering today, butter may be more stable when baking than many other oils.  

Old Fashioned Holidays  A good place to find great old-time traditional recipes. Includes favorites from Jewish and Christian holidays.

Razzle Dazzle Recipes  An astonishing array of Christmas Cakes, plus Eggnog truffles, candy cane cookies, and a variety of fruitcakes -- there's plenty of good ideas here.

CooksRecipes.com   Here you will find Yorkshire Pudding, Cranberry Loaf, Walnut Broccoli casserole, and a variety of other interesting recipes.

Hanukkah Recipes  From AllRecipes.com.   You can also find the Hanukkah story here. (This year Hanukkah is observed from December 26th 2005, through January 2, 2005.)

Kwanzaa Ideas   Menus and recipes.  Ugandan kabobs, creamy pumpkin soup, collard greens -- when do we eat?  (Kwanzaa runs from December 26, 2005 through January 1, 2006.)

Holiday Crafts

When it comes to making gifts and decorations, start in August... or plan on keeping it simple.  And don't forget to focus on creating from your joy -- which is itself something to share with others, with the product (the item you make) being only secondary.

Some Websites with creative project ideas:

Old Fashioned Holidays -- A great spot to find some real traditional ideas, such as the jewel-like Christmas Spider. (My oldest daughter was given one of these by her preschool teacher 10 years ago, and it is still a treasured ornament that makes her eyes light up.)

Page Wise   This site could benefit from more pictures of the crafts, but it has some good ideas.

The E.K. Art Pages   Surf these Earth's Kids pages for even more craft ideas, including seasonal ideas and crafts for Christmas, Hanukkah, and more!
 

Shopping

Remember that shopping doesn't have to be simply a chore.  Take a friend shopping with you and choose some place healthy and inexpensive to share a meal (we like Fresh Choice or the cafeteria at IKEA.  Many fast food places now offer healthy selections as well.)  If you have older children (i.e. old enough not to run off in the store), you might turn shopping into a special night out by taking just one child with you per trip.    Remember to stop often to rest and chat and to replenish yourself with a nurturing beverage (especially water).

And of course, it's important to take advantage of online shopping options.  It's too late for some folks to order items for mail delivery (it all depends on your choice of holiday), but for others, there's still time. 

If you plan on purchasing anything from Amazon.com, you can click the link below (to access their site) and earn points for Earth's Kids that leads to affiliate bonus rewards which support our site.

 

 

Awakening the Spirit of the Season

 

This is an important time to find ways to help yourself, and your family, connect with the deeper spiritual significance of the holidays.  Talk to you children about what your holiday celebrations represent.   How do the different rituals and activities embody the meaning of the holiday?  What values are being celebrated?   Is there some change you want to bring to your holiday observances that would help you connect more authentically to these values?

Just as our observances need not match up to what our culture typically expects, our feelings don't always match up with what is expected.  That is, while the societal emphasis is on joy and appreciation of others, we might be working through feelings of resentment, sorrow, or apathy.    The temptation of course is to stuff these feelings down in order to get on with being part of "the holiday cheer".    At such times, getting emotional support from those close to us is important.  But journaling at this time of year provides an important opportunity to not only express our genuine feelings, but also to capture the underlying threads within our thoughts -- threads that may make sense of our feelings, and give us insight into actions that we might need to take.  The possibility always exists to treat moments like these as an opportunity to grow in awareness, understanding, and spiritual perspective.

 

Reaching Out to Those with Sorrow:

As another holiday season comes shadowed by the war in Iraq, it is obvious that loss and tragedy knows no season; the profound challenges that come to us in life can happen regardless of the advent of the holidays.   What's more, it reminds us that it is at this time of year that those who will not be present (for whatever reason)  will be most poignantly missed.

Naturally at this time of the year we want to reach out to and include those who need the boost offered by loving kindness, a sense of belonging, and the reconnection with joyful holiday traditions.   And there are many ways we may do so (letter writing, care packages, visits, and invitations).  The problem is that we may find that those feeling troubled choose to withdraw or simply paste on a false smile, in order to avoid being a burden at a time when emphasis is on happiness and fun.

Of course we don't want to be overly prying or invasive.  But there are ways we can let people know that we are here for them, and that we seek and invite a real connection.  In Help For the Holidays, Gail Moody offers some very specific suggestions that center around the advice to "Listen, Touch, Invite".    (Read the article.)  As you reach out, remember that no one likes to feel like the object of pity, so be sure to include such persons in a way that is reasonable and satisfying for all involved.  And don't forget to emphasize what their attendance/involvement will give to you and your family! 

 

Tips on Keeping the Stress out of the Holidays:

 

Below we've listed 20 important tips for de-stressing the Holidays (adapted from  Holiday Depression And Stress).  Look over the list and try to identify which ones would give you the biggest boost this holiday season.  Then, choose 2 or 3 to work on in a loving, conscious way -- and let the rest just be nice reminders that help you hold strong in the face of social pressure or guilt to run yourself ragged.

Make realistic expectations for the holiday season.
Set realistic goals for yourself.
Pace yourself. Do not take on more responsibilities than you can handle.
Make a list and prioritize the important activities. This can help make holiday tasks more manageable.
Be realistic about what you can and cannot do.
Do not put all your energy into just one day (i.e., Thanksgiving Day, New Year's Eve). The holiday cheer can be spread from one holiday event to the next.
Live and enjoy the present.
Look to the future with optimism.
Don't set yourself up for disappointment and sadness by comparing today with the good old days of the past.
If you are lonely, try volunteering some time to help others.
Find holiday activities that are free, such as looking at holiday decorations; going window shopping without buying and watching the winter weather whether it's a snowflake, or a raindrop.
Limit your drinking (and over-eating), since these will only increase your feelings of depression.
Try something new. Celebrate the holidays in a new way.
Spend time with supportive and caring people.
Reach out and make new friends.
Make time to contact a long lost friend or relative and spread some holiday cheer.
Make time for yourself!
Let others share the responsibilities of holiday tasks.

 

For even more helpful ideas, try 12 Ways to Keep the Holidays Stress-Free.  (Hint: eat smart, shop smart, and party smart.)

 

Nearly everyone has trouble negotiating all the extra food being passed around at the holidays.  But for those struggling with weight and eating disorders, the combination of stress, tempting treats, and peer pressure to overeat (with joyous abandon) can be a physically and emotionally toxic combination.  Read the article on  Tips for Managing Food & Stress for the Holidays to learn how to handle the season's most common pitfalls.  Be sure to also check out the companion article,  More Hints & Tips.

Giving to Those in Need -- Heart Warming Alternatives To Cash

Certainly there are a number of organizations who need and deserve our donation dollars.  But giving to those in need does not always mean giving money.  Frankly, many of us who would like to contribute generously are not able to, especially at this time of the year.  

But even when we do not have deep pockets, all of us have something of value to give: love, talent, a few hours here or there, or even a well-timed kind word.   With this in mind you might consider these alternatives to donating money:

	Donate items around your house.  Clean out your cupboards, closets, and other storage spaces of clothing, toys, knickknacks, and of course non-perishable food items that you know you aren't going to use.  Send them off to the Goodwill, the Food Bank, or another appropriate organization.  Somebody out there will deeply appreciate those very items that you yourself no longer want.
	Volunteer to help out with the local toy drive or canned food drive.
	Offer your help to a local homeless shelter or battered women's shelter.  Even if you can't be there during the big event (Christmas dinner, for example), perhaps you can lend a hand with picking up supplies, setting up, or cleaning up.   This could even be a family project if you have older children who could lend a hand.
	Volunteer with your local humane society, animal shelter, or animal rescue society.  Dog walkers and other volunteers are always in need.  Even if you can't adopt (another) pet yourself, you can lend some comfort and joy to a fellow creature.  (And you'll brighten the spirits of the humans who staff the shelter as well.)
	Other Ideas:  Check in with your local schools, churches, library, community center, senior center, hospital, or etc. and ask what help they need right now.  Be sure to visit the E.K. Kid's Can Change The World pages for a listing of some truly worthy volunteer organizations.
	Pick A Time & Task That Works For Your Life.  Remember, if your holidays are just too busy, this idea of giving service will make a great New Year's Resolution.   If you don't have time for a weekly commitment, even during simpler times of the year, many organizations have annual events and one-time projects that could use support.

 

 

 

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