Know Your Child
by Linnaea Avenell
Choosing good toys can be a real challenge. In
fact I still remember all the fiascos I underwent as a first time parent
--
the cheap "bargain" toys that broke after only a couple weeks
of play, the expensive
"educational" toys that my child out-grew in a couple of
months, and even the supposedly sure-fire classic toys that were
utterly ignored. What did my child want! She sure didn't
want the same toys I had played with as a child (Barbie Dolls,
wooden blocks, and CandyLand). And she apparently didn't even want
what everyone else's child seemed to adore. How was I to
equip her with toys that would ignite her imagination, help her uncover
life long interests and abilities, and most importantly... give me a few
minutes peace from being both caregiver and entertainment committee.
What I eventually learned, through additional children and through
training as an early childhood educator, is that there are three
principles to selecting the right toys: 1) familiarize yourself
with the different stages of childhood and the toys that are most
appropriate for that age, 2) gravitate toward open-ended toys that can
be used in a variety of different ways, and 3) be alert to your child's
own particular interests.
In her article "Toy Selection",
Mary Sinker gives you an overview of the different types of toys
appropriate for different age groups. This is an important
consideration as giving a child a toy too early will lead to frustration
and possibly even injury, while giving the same toy too late in a
child's development will lead to boredom and disappointment.
Use Sinker's article as a starting point in order to get you pointed
toward the right section of the toy store. But once you are there,
you'll notice that many toys today give a listing of age ranges
appropriate for that toy. We urge to pay strict attention to
age/stage advice for children under three years old, not only for safety
reasons (such as swallowing small parts) but because children in the
first years of life go through amazing changes in their physical and
intellectual development in very short spans of time. And
unfortunately so many of the "activity centers" and other gizmo-oriented
toys are quickly outgrown.
But what complicates this problem further is that
not all children develop at the same rate, or in the same directions.
That is, while one child in your neighborhood playgroup is fascinated by
building up ramps to roll a jingly ball down, another is interested only
in figuring out how to jam the darn thing in his mouth -- or in someone
else's mouth. Both are exploring cause and effect
relationships, but with very different priorities! So spend time
with the children you are buying for. Notice what they play with
now. And aim to buy them a toy they can enjoy now, but will be
able to grow into for some months (or years) to come. (Suggestions.)
As children get older, the problem of individual
tastes becomes more pronounced. Some children seem destined for a
future in product safety testing, tossing everything off the dining room
table to see what will result -- or pulling and tugging on an
item, and banging it on everything in sight. Such children are
asking themselves the question, "What will happen if?" They appear
to have no particular goal in mind other than to see if a thing will
come apart into other things. Another young child of the
same age might obsess over anything
that goes together, especially in puzzle fashion. Or
he or she may love to sit for hours chatting with their toys and
making up little problems or crises that they work out. These
early behaviors are what psychologist Erik Erikson called schemas,
behaviors that a child engages in to test out the world around them and
gather more information, about it and about themselves. They may
seem random and meaningless to us, as adults, but they are really all
expressions of your child's personalized approach to making sense of his
world and exploring his role within it. But these patterns
of interaction can also be your earliest clues about the unique self
that your child will eventually express in much more obvious ways, such
as hobbies and favorite school subjects.
So if you observe a child at play, you will
notice that certain things seem only to frustrate them while other
things simply don't hold their interest. But some other activities
or types of toys will bring them back time and time again. This
repeated attraction is not necessarily
an innate quality of the toy however. It may be an expression of
your child's interests and schemas. And of course, different children have different
agendas -- and different favorite toys. But you will notice that
these favorites often come and go as your child passes through different phases.
Puzzles and blocks maybe be an all consuming obsession for six months,
only to be replaced by superhero action figures, puppets, and dramatic
play (playing "house" or "dress up").
What we want to do early
in life is give our children a wide choice of things to interact with,
to help them zero in on their own areas of interest and to work through
whatever phase they happen to be in. A great way to
find out what their interests are (beyond what you see them playing with
at home) is to take them to a friends house where they can check out
another child's toys. Children's discovery museums, preschools,
daycares, and of course toy stores are other obvious environments where
you can figure out what turns them on in the play department. And
then, as they grow, we want to provide them with the means to explore
their special interests, while still offering them experiences that let
them sample other activities. That is, we may already know our
child loves to paint and is crazy about animals. But as happy as
activities that involve one or both of these subjects makes her, we will
want to keep giving her exposure to new interests that she can "try on
for size".
As we observe our children, one of the things we might notice is that a
child's interests do not always pigeon-hole into the neat mental
categories presumed by the adult. Thus the child that loves
puzzles may also enjoy fitting together wooden railway tracks.
He/she may delight in putting things away, in finishing sentences that
you start ("The horse says...." "Neigh!"), in games that require
assigning objects to their proper grouping (by color, shape, or
function). An underlying theme begins to emerge after a
while: discerning patterns, creating completion, wholeness.
Naturally as adults we want to know just what this means. Will this young prodigy be a computer programmer or a psychologist, an
anthropologist or a professional closet organizer? And the
answer is: we can't
know really. The pattern of unfoldment is not complete yet. And frankly, it's not our business to
try to force it along or to try molding it into some form
familiar to us.
All we can do is provide opportunities for the child to unfold her
potential as she uncovers her interests and abilities.
Toys, of course, are merely one part of this
whole process. Other parts of the process includes interactions
with peers as well as parents and teachers. But by choosing toys with a sensitivity to our child's
interests (rather than buying what we wanted as a child or what all the
other children are playing with), we aid more effectively in the
process of healthy development. The thing to remember of course: we don't know where it's
all heading, "It's a mystery!" (To quote from <I>Shakespeare In
Love</I>). It is our child's journey and we are merely
sharing in it. And while we're on the subject of mysticism,
don't be afraid to play the mystic once in
a while and follow your intuition. Maybe something you get,
a particular toy or book, following that strange hunch from who knows where, will launch a life
long fascination. Remember, play is spontaneous. Don't
be afraid to trust your own playful nature, and have fun!
Toy Selection
by Mary Sinker
The following are some
suggestions for suitable toys for children of various ages. They are
offered as a guide to help in your selection, but remember that all
children are different. Study your child and get to know his or her
interests, abilities and limitations.
Not all children enjoy the
same kinds of play: one child will be interested in building with
blocks or doing puzzles; another may prefer riding bikes or playing
ball; your child may enjoy pretending with a dollhouse or playing
board games.
Try to match the toy to your
child and keep in mind that his or her interest in a toy will often
carry through more than one age group.
|
AGE: 1 to 3
Interests and Abilities
A toddler moves busily within his or her environment-- walking,
climbing, pushing and riding.
Imaginative play begins during this period, as does a strong interest
in manipulating and problem solving with objects.
Toy Suggestions
-
push-pull and ride-on toys
-
small tricycle and wagon
-
balls over 1.75" in diameter
-
wading pool and sandbox--and toys to use in them
-
play appliances, food and utensils
-
dolls, stuffed animals and doll furniture
-
simple puzzles, shape sorters, pegboards and rings on pegs
-
blocks crayons, markers and modeling dough
-
rhythm instruments ,tape player, picture books
|
AGE: 3
to
5
Interests and Abilities
A preschooler loves to be around other children and enjoys sharing
many kinds of activities, particularly imaginative play and simple games.
Toy Suggestions
-
dress-ups and accessories -
props for housekeeping, store and medical play -
puppets -
farm, village, house and other play sets -
small vehicles -
construction toys -
simple board games -
puzzles -
bead threading and lacing sets -
wheeled toys -
backyard gym sets -
art supplies: crayons, markers, modeling dough, paper, tape player and tapes, storybooks
|
AGE: 6 to 9
Interests and Abilities
A school-age child seeks out new information, experiences and
challenges in play.
Extremely social with a clear sense of fairness, a child in
this age group is influenced by peers and has a strong gender identity.
Toy Suggestions
|
 
Related Articles:
Books:
Dr. Toy's Smart Play : How To Raise A Child With a High PQ (Play
Quotient)
by
Stevanne Auerbach,
Dr. Toy
We've all heard of IQ but do you know your
child's PQ or Play Quotient?
A child's ability to play does more than provide for fund and
diversion; it is critical for his or her emotion and intellectual
growth, an teaches everything from social skills to analytical
thinking. For the developing mind of a child, learning to play is
paramount--but is your child getting the most out of playtime?
Stevanne Auerbach, Ph.D., more affectionately known as Dr. Toy has
dedicated a lifetime to the importance of play and gives you
specific advice on which toys to buy and what kind of games to play
to emplower your child's overall development. You'll learn:
How to become your child's play Tutor
How play can strengthen maturity levels and confidence
The pros, cons, and facts of gender specific toys
Guideance for the gifted and special-needs child
Plus practical advice on
Evaluatin a toy's safety, learn which toy manufacturers Dr. Toy
recommends
Craft supplies you should always have on hand
Dr Toy's 100 Best Children's Products
And many more invaluable ways to make playtime a growing experience!
From
Booklist
Play, especially active, creative, and
educational play, helps children develop such basic social and academic
skills as concentration, problem solving, communication, and
cooperation. Factors such as safety, durability, flexibility, and age
appropriateness complicate the challenge parents face in choosing the
right toys for their children at the right time. Auerbach applies her
scientific but not preachy expertise to that challenge. She relies as
much on common sense and parenting insight as on scholarly research to
suggest toys ranging from brooms and plastic cups to books and
watercolors to amuse, stimulate, and activate children. Individual
chapters describe developmental progress from infancy through age 12,
advising age-appropriate toys and products as well as items for children
with special needs. For backup to the book, Auerbach, familiar to many
for her syndicated column, "Dr. Toy," maintains a Web site for toy
evaluation. Kathryn Carpenter
Toy Tips : A Parent's
Essential Guide to Smart Toy Choices
From Publishers Weekly
Many parents don’t take a close look at their children’s toys
until they hear about a recall of a particular item on the news.
Szymanski, founder and president of the research group Toy Tips,
presents an unbiased guide to help parents sort out the morass of toys
on the market before they even purchase them. She advises readers to
approach magazine articles and news stories with a judicious eye, and
suggests they become experts themselves (by reading her book,
naturally), because many award stickers on toys are "nothing more than
thinly disguised public relations campaigns designed to herd parents
toward particular products." Szymanski (along with coauthor Neuborne, a
business journalist) covers the various types of toys available
(activity toys, board games, puzzles, etc.) and evaluates their
suitability for infants through preteens. The breadth of information she
offers is overwhelming, but conscientious parents won’t find a more
comprehensive and impartial approach to intelligently purchasing toys
for their children.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc.
All rights reserved.
Oppenheim Toy Portfolio, 2005:
The Best Toys, Books, Videos, Music & Software for Kids
by
Joanne Oppenheim,
Stephanie Oppenheim,
James Oppenheim (Editor),
Joan Auclair
As featured on NBC's TODAY Show! The experts from
the Oppenheim Toy Portfolio, the independent consumer organization rate
the best (and worst) in children's toys, books, videos, music and
software. Don't waste any more money on products that are a waste of
your money and your child's time. Here's the guide that every parent
(and grandparent) should have before they go shopping.
Guide includes important child development
information, basic gear checklists, product comparisons, best shower and
birthday presents for every budget, multicultural products, science
toys, educational toys and a full chapter on adapting ordinary products
for kids with special needs.
About the Author
Joanne Oppenheim is one of the country's most trusted and
respected child development experts and the author of more than fifty
books for and about children. Joanne is a Contributor to NBC's TODAY
Show.
Stephanie Oppenheim, a former corporate attorney,
is the publisher and cofounder of the Oppenheim Toy Portfolio. She is a
leading consumer authority and a Contributor to NBC's TODAY Show.
James Oppenheim, an attorney and computer
consultant, is the technology editor for the Oppenheim Toy Portfolio.
Toys, Play, and Child Development
by
Jeffrey H. Goldstein (Editor)
"I cite this evolutionary
notion because I propose that children's play, with its repetitive and
exploratory characteristics, represents not only fun but a critically
important..."
There are pronounced differences in the play of
boys and girls. Why do boys prefer war toys, and girls Barbie dolls? Are
video games addictive? What, if anything, do children learn while
playing? Toys, Play and Child Development explores these and other
questions. Parental attitudes and reactions toward war toys are
described, as are the children's views themselves. The book examines how
toys and play contribute to the development of language, imagination,
and intellectual achievement and how they can effectively be used in
child psychotherapy.
Toys & Supplies for Art & Education
 
|
|
